By Style Coach Rachel Tansell-Paues
Planning your wedding day is a rollercoaster filled with ups, downs, twists and turns. It’s a true testament to your patience and strength. We spend a lot of time focusing on what we want, what we can afford and how it will all come together. Sometimes we forget the final outcome – Marriage.
Here are my 5 survival tips for women getting married…
Image credit : ionwedding.com
1. Don’t get crazy
Calm down Bridezilla! Stress does amazing things to the physical and emotional well being and lots of it can make us a little La Vida Loca – just for a little while. If you are starting to feel out of control and everything is getting far too hyped, then you need to back away – very slowly, b a c k i t u p – find the door and exit. Put the cake down, walk away from the flowers, drop the invites and take a breather. Don’t speak to anyone or anything it will just send you into an irrational tail-spin. Find a calming solution for yourself. Count backwards from 20, take 5 deep breathes, go for a fast walk around the backyard or go for a drive to the local café. Wherever you can gain focus and clarity is good. Usually fresh air will help!
2. Be realistic
Your Fiancé is sitting on the couch and your racing around like a lunatic to get everything organised. While launching the remote control into his/her forehead seems like a logical solution or at least a short-term stress reliever, you need to be realistic. Sit down with your Fiancé and tell them that you really need their help and you are feeling overwhelmed. Opening communication lines now is extremely important. Your partner is not a mind reader so don’t expect them to know how you are feeling. If you aren’t talking to them they can’t take some of the load off. Where possible write a list of things to do and work through it step by step.
3. Don’t kill it
OCD or not, your wedding day is the day you want everything to be perfect. Understandably, but trying to control everything right up to the last minute isn’t doing you any favours. The more control you want to have, the more room for error. You know that old story – the one about the boy who wanted a bird so desperately, that when he finely got one, he held it so tight because he didn’t want it to leave him, that he accidently strangled it? Don’t hold onto things so tight that you kill the vibe. Things will go wrong but do you know what, no-one will ever know. They are there to witness your love and commitment to each other, not to look at the sashes on the chairs and the ribbons hanging from the tree. Will it create atmosphere and look beautiful? Sure, but everyone is there for you because they love you and want to witness your vowels of love.
4. It’s not all about you
Ok it is a little, but you can’t get married without the one you love. Be sensitive to their thoughts and contributions. It may not be the way you want it, like it or would do it – get used to this, if you have kids, this will be the biggest learning curve of all! Know they are doing their best and unless you have given strict instruction, you need to let them find their own ground. This extends to your wedding party too. They love you and want to help you. Be kind to them. You invited them to be part of your special day, they are spending their own money to satisfy your wants and are trying to be apart of your day just the way you want it. Yelling uncontrollable profanity at your bridesmaid because they refuse to wear false eyelashes (as they are highly allergic to the glue), is not a logical mindset. If you want people to be apart of your day, you need to be sensitive to their feelings and understand that not everyone will agree and conform. Again, you need to open the communication lines and let everyone know what is happening and what you would like.
5. Have a good time
After all it is one of the best days of your life. Remember the process is only half of it. Having a good time and enjoying it is the other. Don’t forget after the whirlwind is gone, you and your forever partner will be left standing hand-in-hand together. You are a new family unit, ready to create the rest of your lives as one. The party will be over but you will have each other!
Did I miss any vital points?
I hope that helps, happy wedding planning!